Richard's Holland

The Dutch. What a paradox. Mention Amsterdam to someone in the pub and your response will invariably be related to coffee shops and sex shops. It is a place associated with hedonistic liberty in its most explicit forms. This is the Holland young British and American men go for. But then there is the other Holland, the one for late middle aged tourists, the Holland of windmills and tulips, of quaint towns of cobbles, gables and canals. This contradiction is even in the nation’s famous art – van Gogh vs Vermeer.

No where is this conflict more apparent than in the infamous red light district. This is nothing like K Road or Vivian Street. It is actually a very old, very beautiful part of Amsterdam. Unsuspecting tourists can be strolling down a pretty street, watching the canal boats chug past, looking up at the tall and narrow buildings which lean out over the street and risking generally being a hazard for cyclists, when the find themselves in a street with full-length windows. Women stand in doorways in various states of undress. Don’t take a picture though, unless you are game to deal with some severe verbal or physical abuse – it’s an unwritten rule, and these are very scary women. Right in the middle of the area is the Oude Kerk – the Old Church, the oldest in Amsterdam. It’s not as old as the district itself, which has been relieving sailors of their pay for hundreds of years. The Church was built so guilt ridden sailors could stumble out of bars, out of brothels, and straight into redemption at the church. Everyone makes money (including the Church) and everyone (including the sailor) is happy.

I loved Holland. It is so pretty. Everything is clean, tidy, orderly. This hints at the resolution of the conflict inherent in the national character – it is the trait which is more essential to what it is to be Dutch than conservatism or permissiveness. It is pragmatism. The Dutch are, first and foremost, an exceedingly pragmatic people. This is the reason marijuana is decrminalised and prostitution so accepted. It’s just the easiest, most efficient way. There is another reason – and this indicates another facet of the Dutch character – money. Why spend millions trying to suppress marijuana and magic mushrooms? it’s co much easier, and more profitable, to control it.

And yes, Holland is very, very flat.